The F word!

I don't believe I've ever thought about the fact that "fail" is a four letter word. How appropriate. Obviously, that's the F word that I am talking about today. I have decided I want to eliminate it from my vocabulary, from my mind and from my life. Why is that some people are so ready to see someone fail? It's as if they're giddy with the anticipation of watching this person fall flat on their face! How sick and twisted this human race is. Shouldn't we support one another's endeavors to improve upon ourselves in any way we can? We should not put others (and ourselves) down and we should not hold our breath until they (or we) fail. Waiting for failure is a self-fulfilling prophecy intended to sabotage our good intentions. Do you really want to sabotage your friend or your colleague or, most importantly, yourself?

When I decided to starting eating/living Raw, I told a few colleagues of mine about my newly found enthusiasm for a healthier lifestyle and their response was "I give you two months." And now, it's as if they are watching my every move in order to see me fail or falter. It was incredibly discouraging to hear people think so lowly of me that they don't believe I can manage a healthier lifestyle. At the same time, it was empowering because I wanted to prove them wrong. But not anymore. I've known all along that I shouldn't be doing this in order to prove someone wrong or to prove myself to anyone but it was always there in the back of my mind but I am releasing that now. I am doing this to improve myself, I am doing this to be happy. I want to let go of all my preconceived notions about what I should and shouldn't be doing and what people expect of me. I want to be comfortable and happy and if my idea of happiness does not coincide with another person's that should not be a problem. We are, after all, individuals.

My theory is that people get scared/intimidated when you try and improve upon yourself because they feel guilty that they are not living a healthier life as well. They are threatened by this. God only knows why and even though I was one of those people, I still can't really tell you why it was that I resented people who were thinner, more fit, or leading a healthier life than I was. Perhaps it was jealousy. But it's like a friend making your favorite brownies with the full knowledge that you are on a diet; it's sabotage disguised as a sweet gesture. I am done with the ulterior motives and I am done setting myself up for failure by listening to what others have to say as if it's set in stone. From this point forward I will try my hardest to live my life with only my own health and well-being in mind, I will take everything I read and hear with a grain of salt and I will only do what I feel is right for me. I am not one size fits all.

Going Raw: Day Four (and feeling empowered)

Despite this itchy rash on my arm and awful coughing and phlegm that I won't go into detail about, I feel amazing!

This is day four and for the first time I feel like I can do this! I can tackle this mission and I can be happy and healthy and I can succeed.

I don't know if it's all of the blogs and books I've been reading but since I've started eating raw, I've been a nervous wreck and today...I feel like everything is going to be okay, I can see the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel, I can see myself getting better and better and I can envision myself being a pro at this lifestyle.

Please keep in mind, I am usually NEVER this cheery. I hate pep and anything that goes along with it, I'm a realist. So it is highly unusual for me to be this elated given that my results haven't even started to show! I don't want to think about that though. I want to be happy in this moment and not worry about whether I'm losing weight or eating too much.

For the first time I'm taking the time to listen to my body and understand what it is telling me. I'm trying to learn the language and really give it what it needs. And now, I've started reading up on food combining and it's a highly intimidating subject but what I've come to realize the two big rules are (and a big thank you to Gena for this) don't mix starches with proteins and don't eat fruit after a bigger meal. For right now, I think I have enough on my plate that food combining isn't the biggest worry I have so I won't even focus too much on it. But if I have to follow some rules down the line, I'll make them as simple as I can. I will still have my green smoothies in the morning and I will focus on making my meals centered around mainly greens with everything else simply as a side and no desserts (i.e. fruits) after my main meal unless my body is actually telling me to and I'm not just bored or accustomed to doing it.

I am still trying to focus on just doing this one day at a time and not looking too far down the road and today, I'm choosing to eat raw and obey my body.